Who's the better salesman?

I love being on the other side of the fence - when people are selling to me. It's always educational and seldom dull being sold to.
We're thinking of some work in the kitchen at the moment. To date we've had two companies come along and spend some time with us working through what's possible. The first was a small local business and the owner turned up (in his flash car complete with a sticker signifying the private school we would be paying his kids to attend if we bought through them). The second was a nationally (internationally?) recognised business where the guy had parked around the corner so I can only assume it was a Rolls Royce (too embarrassed to show off) or Lada (too embarrassed to show)!
The first guy was great - asking all the open questions (what sort of cooking? how often? etc etc). He then talked through what wasn't possible due to the physical constraints, asked about budget and then after taking measurements (laser measurement device in case you're interested), promised to return in a couple of weeks with 3-5 ideas on paper which he and his team would work up. 2 hours well spent we thought.
The second guy turned up with his dodgy tie and plastic shoes (OK, I'm a sartorial snob). But most importantly his laptop and checklist. He then proceeded to ask closed questions (do you want this? do you want that?) and then input onto his laptop, together with the measurements from his (metal) tape. After 30 minutes of fiddling about he had a first drawing - and the very capable software was able to provide 3D views of the room. But the best thing was we had him there "driving" the software and us throwing ideas at him and trying them out in 3D. We agreed on one particular layout - and he promised to show us the details once we'd committed to his firm doing the work!

My observations are:
Is it always men that do kitchens?
Are open questions the best way to start the sales process? (or to put it another way, how important are open questions in starting the sales process?!)
Is it best to "show a bit of leg" and then promise more on the second visit? Or is it best to be demure and promise everything for the follow up?
Is the best thing to mull over requirements, then design the solution (sounds like SSADM to me)? Or is it to design on the hoof and then test as you go (SCRUM)?
I suspect what we'll do is wait and see what the first guy comes up with - but tellingly neither of them has sold or come close to selling anything yet.

The real problem

I've got a bee in my bonnet about the "real problem". The bee stuck there a couple of weeks ago while reading this article: http://http://www.spectator.co.uk/columnists/all/6227818/the-wiki-man.thtml - in particular the paragraph on getting to Birmingham by train.
It made me start thinking about what the real problem is and how the technology industry, as well as other industries, tries to solve that problem.
In the Birmingham train example, the real problem isn't that people necessarily want to get to Birmingham any quicker (or in my case ever!) but that they have too many things to fit into a day. So the solution of TVs on a train helps fit that extra thing into the day. And why stop at TVs, you could have massage therapy, hairdressers, GPs, tarot readers, bookies and exercise bikes! All helping you make the most of your journey and all of them costing a lot less than 120 miles of steel and concrete.
So I'm now on a mission to uncover the "real problem" behind all sorts of things. And then try and find the "real" answer.
First questions: What's the problem that a Smart Meter roll out is trying to address? Is there a better solution to address that problem?